If you think I didn't drive around for hours tonight stealing orange trash bags full of leaves from the curbs in my neighborhood, think again.
If you think I won't be using said stolen garbage to decorate for Pumpkinfest, think again.
If you think Ryan will be anything but thrilled about what this newfound abundance of decomposing leaves will mean for our compost pile, think again.
If you think 90% of said compost will be going anywhere in the garden other than right where his giant pumpkin will be planted in the spring, think again.
If you are thinking of missing Pumpkinfest, think again. So far, I have four guests traveling in from other states for this party. I stole trash for it. It's gonna rock.
Anyone know where I can get an inflatable pumpkin lawn ornament? I used to have one, but it was stolen from me by my neurotic relatives who convinced me it was frivolous, and that the limited closet space in my then-apartment should be vacated of inflatable lawn ornaments to make room for my spouse-to-be's belongings. As you can see, said neurotic relatives LACK VISION.
I'm going to bed now.