Thursday, April 1, 2010

My face stinks

I have worse acne now than I did as a teenager. In fact, as a teenager, I enjoyed (read: took for granted) a nearly perfect complexion. Although I do not have a serious problem now, it is enough to have made its way onto my self-consciousness radar which, for a woman who cuts the back of her own hair without using a mirror, should be regarded as at least somewhat significant.

I have been fighting the good fight with benzoyl peroxide and have in the process created many, many bleachy spots on towels, shirts, and various other things that contact my face. Miraculously, the fuscia pillowcase from Ikea has been spared. Ryan likes to point out that slathering my face in a carcinogenic goo every night may be sabotaging my efforts to prevent all disease using primarily blended spinach as prophylaxis. Perhaps, he suggests, I should increase my chances at disease-free success by not dipping my face in toxic, bleaching, burny solutions.

He may have a point.

Thus, last week at the supermarket, I decided to take a gander at the offerings of the "natural" products aisle (I scoff at and enquotiate the word natural because uranium is natural, people, and we need to be conscientious enough to read our labels, but I digress). I found a vial of tea tree zit prevention somethingorother and determined that all of its ingredients were edible, so I bought it. I anointed my face with it. It is more effective than the benzoyl peroxide ever was, and the linens will thank me.

But it makes me smell like a hippie. I don't care how many times I have been accused of actually being a hippie for reasons including my distaste for meat, political views, or thoughts about western medicine in general, though I do think it strange to be a called a hippie when I don't smoke pot. I do, however, mind that my own face smells like the love child of a health food store and a Phish show.

But I don't mind it enough to stop, at least for now. Sorry if you have to smell me; at least your eyes won't be offended by my blemishes. Blemishes!

9 comments:

Karen said...

You make me laugh! I also have been fighting this late fight against acne, not having had it in my teens. It's awful! To my husband's dissappointment I've recently spent a considerable chunk of money on face soaps and lotions looking for something that will work! Maybe I should try your edible ointment. Living in a community of Hippies, I find the sent of lavendar-sage-nag-champa-tea-tree-earth quite soothing.

sara said...

tea tree oil is a dream come true. mix it with some willow bark, and you are all set to kill those little blemishes. also, another reason why i love tea tree oil: add a drop or two to a washing machine full of clothes and it will naturally rid those clothes of any & all bacteria. i do this to my sheets or pillow cases after i've been sick. love it.

CK said...

tea tree oil is amazing. wow.

ps thanks for the bf book suggestions!!! i'll tell you what i find.

ixoj said...

You've offered me hope- I'm on my way out the door right now to go find myself some tea tree oil. Fingers crossed.

Carolyn said...

So funny. Your blog always gives me a much needed laugh.

Rowena's Auntie said...

Never had a true zit problem myself, but... might I suggest you invest in a little Retin-A? Dab a little on a zit, forming zit, bit of skin thinking about gathering courage to become a zit or all out pimple-age before you go to bed at night. (And I mean a VERY little bit.) You might wake up to a nicely reclaimed zit-free face.

Worse case scenario, you wake up at 40 and only look 33?

Jill said...

Try the proactive face mask, sucka. I had terrible skin for most of my life and now it is pretty good

missy. said...

I am happy you smell like a hippie.

Tigger said...

Tea Tree Zit Prevention you say? I'm thinkin' I better try some of that. Thanks for the post!